Day 5 ~

1 John 4:18 ~ There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.

The word fear means ~ an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain or a threat.

I have heard it preached more times than I can remember that I should FEAR the LORD. In fact, it was that FEAR of GOD, of HELL, and of JUDGEMENT that brought me to more than one altar during my short life.

I would pray and beg God for forgiveness in order to avoid the eternal fires of hell. Before long, I'd be back in the same condition I was in before, yielding to the desires of my flesh and avoiding God.

It was only after hitting my rock bottom that I began to learn more about my eternal salvation. I come to realize that my fear of God was really a fear of people and of not pleasing people. I tried to please my spouse, I tried to please my children, I tried to please my parents, I tried to please my bosses, my employees, my friends, and acquaintances. Somehow, I got the God of my salvation mixed up with people that I had made god in my life. When I couldn't live up to their expectations, I would throw my hands up in the air and exclaim, "what's the use!" then I'd go and do even worse than I had before. Hiding, avoiding, and lying. I continued to make my bed in an emotional hell, here on this earth.

It was only when I abandoned the doctrine of fear and hell that I personally come to my truth: God is loving and God is good. God is pleased with my efforts big and small. God covers a fault. God accepts apologies and when you make a mess of your life, God gently helps you reestablish your goings. God is not hard on people. People are hard on people. God loves you when everyone else is kicking you while you are down. God is so easily entreated. My God is gentle and fellowships with me always. God never forces God's self on me but is always there for me when I go to my prayer closet. I never seem to get an "I told you so." from God.

We can continue to create a god in our image or we can accept that God's ways are higher than our ways. God's way is love and charity. God is God and beside God, there is none other.

I am the beneficiary of His charity daily. God keeps giving to me, knowing that I am a charity case and have no way of repayment.

I sin daily. It is the nature of my flesh to do so. You might think without fear that I sin more but I have found it to be right the opposite. I am not sinless, but I do sin less.

I sin less because I do not run from God anymore. I accept myself and I accept that God loves me just the way I am and because of that, I fellowship with God more. Good company causes one to want to do better and God is good company.